American Beauty

INT. FITTS HOUSE - RICKY'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

On VIDEO: JANE BURNHAM lays in bed, wearing a tank top. She's sixteen, with dark, intense eyes.

JANE

I need a father who's a role model, not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school.

(snorts)

What a lame-o. Somebody really should put him out of his misery.

Her mind wanders for a beat.

RICKY (O.C.)

Want me to kill him for you?

Jane looks at us and sits up.

JANE

(deadpan)

Yeah, would you?

FADE TO BLACK.

FADE IN:

EXT. ROBIN HOOD TRAIL - EARLY MORNING

We're FLYING above suburban America, DESCENDING SLOWLY toward a tree-lined street.

LESTER (V.O.)

My name is Lester Burnham. This is my neighborhood. This is my street. This... is my life. I'm forty-two years old. In less than a year, I'll be dead.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - MASTER BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

We're looking down at a king-sized BED from OVERHEAD:

LESTER BURNHAM lies sleeping amidst expensive bed linens, face down, wearing PAJAMAS. An irritating ALARM CLOCK RINGS. Lester gropes blindly to shut it off.

LESTER (V.O.)

Of course, I don't know that yet. He rolls over, looks up at us and sighs. He doesn't seem too thrilled at the prospect of a new day.

LESTER (V.O.) (cont'd)

And in a way, I'm dead already.

He sits up and puts on his slippers.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - MASTER BATH - MOMENTS LATER

Lester thrusts his face directly into a steaming hot shower.

ANGLE from outside the shower: Lester's naked body is silhouetted through the fogged-up glass door. It becomes apparent he is masturbating.

LESTER (V.O.)

(amused)

Look at me, jerking off in the shower.

(then)

This will be the high point of my day. It's all downhill from here.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - MOMENTS LATER

CLOSE on a single, dewy AMERICAN BEAUTY ROSE. A gloved hand with CLIPPERS appears and SNIPS the flower off.

CAROLYN BURNHAM tends her rose bushes in front of the Burnham house. A very well-put together woman of forty, she wears color-coordinated gardening togs and has lots of useful and expensive tools.

Lester watches her through a WINDOW on the first floor, peeping out through the drapes.

LESTER (V.O.)

That's my wife Carolyn. See the way the handle on those pruning shears matches her gardening clogs? That's not an accident.

EXT. JIMS' HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

In the fenced front yard of the house next door, a dog BARKS repeatedly. A MAN in a conservative suit (JIM #1) chastises the barking dog.

JIM #1

Hush, Bitsy. You hush. What is wrong?

LESTER (V.O.)

That's our next-door neighbor Jim.

A second MAN in a conservative suit (JIM #2) comes out of the house.

LESTER (V.O.) (cont'd)

And that's his lover, Jim.

JIM #2

(re: barking dog)

What in the world is wrong with her? She had a walk this morning.

JIM #1

And a jerky treat.

JIM #2

You spoil her.

(sternly)

Bitsy. No bark. Come inside. Now.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Lester watches all this from the window.

CAROLYN

Good morning, Jim!

Jim #1 walks toward the fence to greet Carolyn.

JIM #1

Morning, Carolyn.

CAROLYN

(overly friendly)

I just love your tie! That color!

JIM #1

I just love your roses. How do you get them to flourish like this?

CAROLYN

Well, I'll tell you. Egg shells and Miracle Grow.

Jim #1 and Carolyn continue to chat, unaware that Lester is watching them.

LESTER (V.O.)

Man. I get exhausted just watching her.

Lester's POV: We can't hear what Jim and Carolyn are saying, but she's overly animated, like a TV talk show host.

LESTER (V.O.) (cont'd)

She wasn't always like this. She used to be happy. We used to be happy.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - JANE'S ROOM - CONTINUOUS

JANE is seated at her desk, working at her computer.

LESTER (V.O.)

My daughter Jane. Only child.

CLOSE on the COMPUTER MONITOR: A PERSONAL BANKING SOFTWARE window suddenly disappears to reveal another window: a PLASTIC SURGERY WEBSITE, featuring clinical "before" and "after" photos of surgically augmented breasts.

LESTER (V.O.) (cont'd)

Janie's a pretty typical teenager. Angry, insecure, confused. I wish I could tell her that's all going to pass...

Outside, a CAR HORN BLARES. Jane stuffs items into her BACKPACK.

LESTER (V.O.) (cont'd)

But I don't want to lie to her.

We HEAR the CAR HORN again from outside. Jane studies herself in a mirror, then shifts to get a good profile of her breasts.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Carolyn stands next to a platinum-colored MERCEDES-BENZ ML320, reaching in through the drivers' window to blow the HORN again.

Jane shuffles out of the house, her backpack slung over her shoulder.

CAROLYN

Jane. Honey. Are you trying to look unattractive?

JANE

Yes.

CAROLYN

Well, congratulations. You've succeeded admirably.

Jane gets in the car. Lester hurries out the front door, carrying a BRIEFCASE.

CAROLYN (cont'd)

Lester, could you make me a little later, please? Because I'm not quite late enough.

Lester's briefcase suddenly springs open and his papers spill all over the driveway. He drops to his knees to gather everything.

JANE

Nice going, Dad.

Lester smiles sheepishly, trying to lighten the moment.

His POV: Carolyn looks down at us, contemptuous but also bored, as if she gave up expecting anything more long ago.

LESTER (V.O.)

Both my wife and daughter think I'm this gigantic loser, and... they're right.

INT. MERCEDES-BENZ ML320 - A SHORT TIME LATER

Carolyn is driving; Jane stares out the window. Lester is asleep in the back seat.

LESTER (V.O.)

I have lost something. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I know I didn't always feel this... sedated. But you know what? It's never too late to get it back.

INT. OFFICE BUILDING - DAY

Lester sits at his workstation, a BEIGE CUBICLE surrounded by IDENTICAL BEIGE CUBICLES. He's staring at a computer monitor and talking on a HEADSET PHONE. The beleaguered expression on his face is at odds with the light, friendly tone of his voice.

LESTER

Hello, this is Lester Burnham from Media Monthly magazine, I'm calling for Mr. Tamblin, please?... Well, we're all under a deadline here, uh, but you see, there is some basic information about the product launch that isn't even covered in your press release and I... Yeah. Can I ask you a question? Who is Tamblin? Does he exist? 'Cause he doesn't ever seem to come in... Yeah, okay, I'll leave my number...

BRAD, a dapper man in his thirties, approaches and observes Lester, who is unaware of his presence.

LESTER (cont'd)

It's 555 0199. Lester Burnham. Thank you!

Lester disconnects the call, obviously irritated.

BRAD

Hey Les. You got a minute?

Lester turns around, smiling perfunctorily

LESTER

For you, Brad? I've got five.

INT. BRAD'S OFFICE - MOMENTS LATER

Brad is seated behind his desk in his big corner office.

BRAD

I'm sure you can understand our need to cut corners around here.

Lester sits across from him, looking small and isolated.

LESTER

Oh, sure. Times are tight, and you gotta free up cash. Gotta spend money to make money. Right?

BRAD

Exactly. So...

Brad stands, ready to usher Lester out.

LESTER

(blurts)

Like the time when Mr. Flournoy used the company MasterCard to pay for that hooker, and then she used the card numbers and stayed at the St. Regis for, what was it, like, three months?

BRAD

(startled)

That's unsubstantiated gossip.

LESTER

That's fifty thousand dollars. That's somebody's salary. That's somebody who's gonna get fired because Craig has to pay women to fuck him!

BRAD

Jesus. Calm down. Nobody's getting fired yet. That's why we're having everyone write out a job description, mapping out in detail how they contribute. That way, management can assess who's valuable and--

LESTER

Who's expendable.

BRAD

It's just business.

LESTER

(angry)

I've been writing for this magazine for fourteen years, Brad. You've been here how long, a whole month?

BRAD

(frank)

I'm one of the good guys, Les. I'm trying to level with you. This is your one chance to save your job.

Lester stares at him, powerless.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - LATE AFTERNOON

A MOVING VAN is parked in front of the COLONIAL HOUSE next door to the Burnhams'. Movers carry furniture toward the house.

The Mercedes-Benz pulls into the Burnham driveway. Carolyn drives, Lester is in the passenger seat.

CAROLYN

--there is no decision, you just write the damn thing!

LESTER

You don't think it's weird and kinda fascist?

CAROLYN

Possibly. But you don't want to be unemployed.

LESTER

Oh, well, let's just all sell our souls and work for Satan, because it's more convenient that way.

CAROLYN

Could you be just a little bit more dramatic, please, huh?

As they get out of the car, Carolyn scopes out the MOVERS next door.

CAROLYN (cont'd)

So we've finally got new neighbors. You know, if the Lomans had let me represent them, instead of--

(heavy disdain)

--"The Real Estate King," that house would never have sat on the market for six months.

She heads into the house, followed by Lester.

LESTER

Well, they were still mad at you for cutting down their sycamore.

CAROLYN

Their sycamore? C'mon! A substantial portion of the root structure was on our property. You know that. How can you call it their sycamore? I wouldn't have the heart to just cut down something if it wasn't partially mine, which of course it was.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - DINING ROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT

We HEAR EASY-LISTENING MUSIC.

Lester, Carolyn and Jane are eating dinner by CANDLELIGHT. RED ROSES are bunched in a vase at the center of the table. Nobody makes eye contact, or even seems aware of anybody else's presence, until...

JANE

Mom, do we always have to listen to this elevator music?

CAROLYN

(considers)

No. No, we don't. As soon as you've prepared a nutritious yet savory meal that I'm about to eat, you can listen to whatever you like.

A long beat. Lester suddenly turns to Jane.

LESTER

So Janie, how was school?

JANE

(suspicious)

It was okay.

LESTER

Just okay?

JANE

No, Dad. It was spec-tac-ular.

A beat.

LESTER

Well, you want to know how things went at my job today?

Now she looks at him as if he's lost his mind.

LESTER (cont'd)

They've hired this efficiency expert, this really friendly guy named Brad, how perfect is that? And he's basically there to make it seem like they're justified in firing somebody, because they couldn't just come right out and say that, could they? No, no, that would be too... honest. And so they've asked us--

(off her look)

--you couldn't possibly care any less, could you?

Carolyn is watching this closely.

JANE

(uncomfortable)

Well, what do you expect? You can't all of a sudden be my best friend, just because you had a bad day.

She gets up and heads toward the kitchen.

JANE (cont'd)

I mean, hello. You've barely even spoken to me for months.

She's gone. Lester notices Carolyn looking at him critically.

LESTER

Oh, what, you're mother-of-the-year? You treat her like an employee.

CAROLYN

(taken aback)

What?!

Lester is quiet, staring at his plate.

CAROLYN (cont'd)

(more authority)

What?

Lester gets up and starts after Jane, taking his plate with him.

LESTER

I'm going to get some ice cream.

Carolyn watches him go, irritated.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Jane stands at the sink, rinsing off her plate. Lester enters.

LESTER

Honey, I'm sorry. I...

Jane turns and stares at him, waiting for him to finish.

LESTER (cont'd)

I'm sorry I haven't been more available, I just... I'm...

He's looking to her for a little help here, but she's too uncomfortable with this sudden intimacy to give him any.

LESTER (cont'd)

(finally)

You know, you don't always have to wait for me to come to you...

JANE

Oh, great. So now it's my fault?

LESTER

I didn't say that. It's nobody's fault. Janie, what happened? You and I used to be pals.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

On VIDEO: We're looking through GREENHOUSE WINDOWS at Lester and Jane in the kitchen We can't hear what they're saying, but it's obvious it's not going well.

Jane puts her plate in the dishwasher and leaves. We FOLLOW HER out the door, then the camera JERKS back to Lester calling after her.

CLOSE on the face of RICKY FITTS, illuminated by the screen of his DIGICAM as he videotapes. Ricky is eighteen, but his eyes are much older. Beneath his Zen-like tranquility lurks something wounded... and dangerous.

His POV, on VIDEO: Through the kitchen window, we see Lester at the sink, rinsing off his plate, muttering to himself. His head suddenly jerks up and he looks at us, as if he realizes he's being watched.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS

Lester's POV: We're looking out through the kitchen window at the point where Ricky was just standing, but he's no longer there.

Lester turns off the faucet, dries his hands, then tosses the towel on the counter on his way out, where it lands next to a framed PHOTOGRAPH of Lester, Carolyn, and a much-younger Jane, taken several years earlier at an amusement park.

It's startling how happy they look.

EXT. SALE HOUSE - DAY

CLOSE on a wooden SIGN that reads:

OPEN HOUSE TODAY
BURNHAM & ASSOCIATES REALTY
555-0195 Carolyn Burnham

The sign is planted in front of a RUN-DOWN HOME in a run-down neighborhood. The Mercedes is parked in front of the house. Carolyn, wearing a smart business suit, is unloading a box of cleaning supplies and a BOOMBOX from the back of the Mercedes when something across the street catches her eye.

Her POV: In front of a different house with much more curb appeal is another SIGN, featuring a picture of a handsome silver-haired MAN. It reads:

Another One SOLD By Buddy Kane
The Real Estate King 555-0100

Carolyn frowns and slams the back of the Mercedes shut.

INT. SALE HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - MOMENTS LATER

The interior of this house is ugly, oppressive and tasteless. Carolyn opens the front door, breathes deeply and solemnly announces:

CAROLYN

I will sell this house today.

She neatly arranges her sales materials on a desk, then strips down to her undergarments.

MONTAGE:

We see Carolyn, working with fierce concentration as she:

Cleans glass doors that overlook the patio and pool;

Doggedly scrubs countertops in the kitchen;

Perches on a stepladder to dust a cheap-looking ceiling fan in the master bedroom;

And vacuums a dirty carpet that will never be clean.

Throughout all this, she keeps repeating to herself:

CAROLYN

I will sell this house today. I will sell this house today. I will sell this house today.

INT. SALE HOUSE - BATHROOM - LATER

Carolyn stands in front of the mirror, wearing her suit once more, applying lipstick. She stares at her reflection critically.

CAROLYN

I will sell this house today.

She says this as if it were a threat, then notices a smudge on the mirror and wipes it off.

EXT. SALE HOUSE - FRONT YARD - LATER

The front door opens to reveal Carolyn, greeting us with the smile she thinks could sell ice to an Eskimo.

CAROLYN

Welcome. I'm Carolyn Burnham!

INT. SALE HOUSE - FOYER - CONTINUOUS

Smiling, Carolyn leads a man and woman into the living room. They're thirtyish, and they've seen a lot of houses today.

CAROLYN

This living room is very dramatic. Wait 'til you see the native stone fireplace!

The man and woman glance around the dark room, unimpressed.

CAROLYN (cont'd)

A simple cream would really lighten things up. You could even put in a skylight.

The woman wrinkles her face, skeptical.

CAROLYN (cont'd)

Well, why don't we go into the kitchen?

INT. SALE HOUSE - KITCHEN - LATER

Carolyn enters, followed by a different couple in their fifties.

CAROLYN

It's a dream come true for any cook. Just filled with positive energy. Huh?

INT. SALE HOUSE - MASTER BEDROOM - LATER

Carolyn stands with a different couple: African American, late twenties. The woman is pregnant.

CAROLYN

...and you'll be surprised how much a ceiling fan can cut down on your energy costs.

EXT. SALE HOUSE - BACK YARD - LATER

Carolyn stands by the pool next to two fortyish WOMEN.

CAROLYN

You know, you could have some really fun backyard get-togethers out here.

WOMAN #1

The ad said this pool was "lagoon-like." There's nothing "lagoon-like" about it. Except for maybe the bugs.

WOMAN #2

There's not even any plants out here.

CAROLYN

(re: shrub)

What do you call this? Is this not a plant? If you have a problem with the plants, I can always call my landscape architect. Solved.

WOMAN #2

I mean, I think "lagoon," I think waterfall, I think tropical. This is a cement hole.

A beat.

CAROLYN

I have some tiki torches in the garage.

INT. SALE HOUSE - SUN ROOM - LATER

Carolyn enters, alone. She's furious. She locks the sliding glass door and starts to pull the vertical blinds shut, then stops. Standing very still, with the blinds casting shadows across her face, she starts to cry: brief, staccato SOBS that seemingly escape against her will. Suddenly she SLAPS herself, hard.

CAROLYN

Shut up. Stop it. You... Weak!

But the tears continue. She SLAPS herself again.

CAROLYN (cont'd)

Weak. Baby. Shut up. Shut up! Shut up!

She SLAPS herself repeatedly until she stops crying. She stands there, taking deep breaths until she has everything under control, then pulls the blinds shut, once again all business. She walks out calmly, leaving us alone in the dark, empty room.

We HEAR CHEERING and APPLAUSE.

INT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM - NIGHT

We're at a high-school BASKETBALL GAME. Teenage boys play a fast and furious game. One team wearing pale blue and white uniforms scores a basket. Perky cheerleaders jump up and down as the CROWD goes wild.

Seated in the bleachers, next to the high school BAND, is a group of about twenty TEENAGE GIRLS, dressed in pale blue and white uniforms. Among them, Jane sits next to ANGELA HAYES. At sixteen, Angela is strikingly beautiful; with perfect even features, blonde hair and a nubile young body, she's the archetypal American dream girl.

Jane stands and scans the bleachers.

ANGELA

Who are you looking for?

JANE

My parents are coming tonight. They're trying to, you know, take an active interest in me.

ANGELA

Gross. I hate it when my mom does that.

JANE

They're such assholes. Why can't they just have their own lives?

INT. MERCEDES-BENZ ML320 - CONTINUOUS

Carolyn drives. Lester is slumped in the passenger seat.

LESTER

What makes you so sure she wants us to be there? Did she ask us to come?

CAROLYN

Of course not. She doesn't want us to know how important this is to her. But she's been practicing her steps for weeks.

LESTER

Well, I bet money she's going to resent it. And I'm missing the James Bond marathon on TNT.

CAROLYN

Lester, this is important. I'm sensing a real distance growing between you and Jane.

LESTER

Growing? She hates me.

CAROLYN

She's just willful.

LESTER

She hates you too.

Carolyn stares at him, unsure of how to respond.

INT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM - LATER

The uniformed girls now stand in formation on the gym floor.

ANNOUNCER

(over P.A.)

And now, for your half-time entertainment, Rockwell High's award-winning Dancing Spartanettes!

In the crowded stands, Lester and Carolyn find seats.

LESTER

We can leave right after this, right?

The HIGH SCHOOL BAND plays "ON BROADWAY." On the gym floor, the girls perform. They're well-rehearsed, but too young to carry off the ambitious Vegas routine they're attempting.

Lester, watching from the stands, picks out his daughter.

His POV: Jane performs well, concentrating. Dancing awkwardly next to her is Angela. Suddenly Angela looks right at us and smiles... a lazy, insolent smile.

Lester leans forward in his seat.

His POV: We're focused on Angela now. Everything starts to SLOW DOWN... the MUSIC acquires an eerie ECHO...

We ZOOM slowly toward Lester as he watches, transfixed.

His POV: Angela's awkwardness gives way to a fluid grace, and "ON BROADWAY" FADES into dreamy, hypnotic MUSIC. The light on Angela grows stronger, and the other girls DISAPPEAR entirely.

Lester is suddenly alone in the stands, spellbound.

His POV: Angela looks directly at us now, dancing only for Lester. Her movements take on a blatantly erotic edge as she starts to unzip her uniform, teasing us with an expression that's both innocent and knowing, then... she pulls her uniform OPEN and a profusion of RED ROSE PETALS spill forth... and we SMASH CUT TO:

INT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM - CONTINUOUS

Angela, fully clothed, is once again surrounded by the other girls. The HIGH SCHOOL BAND plays its last note, the Dancing Spartanettes strike their final pose, and the audience APPLAUDS.

Carolyn claps along with the rest of the audience. Lester just sits there, unable to take his eyes off Angela.

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM - LATER

The game is long over. Jane and Angela come out of the gym.

JANE

Oh shit, they're still here.

Her POV: Lester and Carolyn stand at the edge of the parking lot.

LESTER

Janie!

CAROLYN

Hi! I really enjoyed that!

She crosses reluctantly toward her parents, followed by Angela.

LESTER

Congratulations, honey, you were great.

JANE

I didn't win anything.

LESTER

(to Angela)

Hi, I'm Lester. Janie's dad.

ANGELA

Oh. Hi.

An awkward beat.

JANE

This is my friend, Angela Hayes.

LESTER

Okay, good to meet you. You were also good tonight. Very... precise.

ANGELA

(warming)

Thanks.

CAROLYN

(to Angela)

Nice to meet you, Angela.

(to Jane)

Honey, I'm so proud of you. I watched you very closely, and you didn't screw up once.

(then, to Lester)

Okay, we have to go.

She starts toward the parking lot. Lester stays behind.

LESTER

So, what are you girls doing now?

JANE

Dad.

ANGELA

We're going out for pizza.

LESTER

Oh really, do you need a ride? We can give you a ride. I have a car. You wanna come with us?

ANGELA

Thanks... but I have a car.

LESTER

Oh, you have a car. Oh. That's great! That's great, because Janie's thinking about getting a car soon too, aren't you, honey?

JANE

(you freak)

Dad. Mom's waiting for you.

LESTER

Well, it was very nice meeting you, Angela. Any, uh, friend of Janie's is a friend of mine.

Angela smiles, aware of the power she has over him. He is mesmerized; grateful, even.

LESTER (cont'd)

Well... I'll be seeing you around then.

Lester waves awkwardly as he crosses off.

JANE

Could he be any more pathetic?

ANGELA

I think it's sweet. And I think he and your mother have not had sex in a long time.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - MASTER BEDROOM - A FEW HOURS LATER

CLOSE on a solitary red ROSE PETAL as it falls slowly through the air.

We're looking down on Lester and Carolyn in bed. Even in sleep, Carolyn looks determined. Lester is awake and stares up at us.

LESTER

It's the weirdest thing.

The ROSE PETAL drifts into view, landing on his pillow.

LESTER (cont'd)

I feel like I've been in a coma for about twenty years, and I'm just now waking up.

More ROSE PETALS fall onto the bed, and he smiles up at...

His POV: Angela, naked, FLOATS above us as a deluge of ROSE PETALS falls around her. Her hair fans out around her head and GLOWS with a subtle, burnished light. She looks down at us with a smile that is all things...

Lester smiles back and LAUGHS, as ROSE PETALS cover his face.

LESTER (cont'd)

Spec-tac-ular.

EXT. ROBIN HOOD TRAIL - CONTINUOUS

A WHITE BMW 328si CONVERTIBLE is parked on the street outside the Burnham's house. We HEAR girlish LAUGHTER from inside.

INT. ANGELA'S BMW - CONTINUOUS

Angela is behind the wheel, Jane in the passenger seat. They're passing a JOINT back and forth.

JANE

I'm sorry my dad was so weird tonight.

ANGELA

It's okay. I'm used to guys drooling over me. It started when I was about twelve, I'd go out to dinner with my parents. Every Thursday night, Red Lobster. And every guy there would stare at me when I walked in. And I knew what they were thinking. Just like I knew guys at school thought about me when they jerked off.

JANE

Vomit.

ANGELA

No, I liked it. And I still like it. If people I don't even know look at me and want to fuck me, it means I really have a shot at being a model. Which is great, because there's nothing worse in life than being ordinary.

An awkward beat. Jane stares at the floor.

JANE

I really think it'll happen for you.

ANGELA

Oh, I know. Because everything that was meant to happen, does. Eventually.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

On VIDEO: Jane gets out of the car, still LAUGHING, and waves as Angela pulls away. We ZOOM toward Jane as she walks up the driveway. She turns suddenly, sensing our presence.

Her POV: We're looking at the COLONIAL HOUSE next door where the moving van was parked earlier. The front porch is shrouded in darkness... then a PORCH LIGHT abruptly reveals Ricky. As usual, he's dressed conservatively. There is a BEEPER attached to his belt, and his DIGICAM dangles loosely around his neck.

Irritated, Jane stares at him, hard.

JANE

Asshole.

He looks back at her curiously, then raises his Digicam and starts to videotape her.

His POV, on VIDEO: Jane, angry and self-conscious, turns and walks quickly toward her house, flipping us off as she goes.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - FOYER - CONTINUOUS

Jane enters, closes and locks the door. She quickly TURNS OFF THE LIGHT that's been left on for her, then peeks through a window.

Her POV: There's no sign of Ricky.

Jane turns back into the room, her heart racing... and smiles.

INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - JANE'S BEDROOM - THE NEXT MORNING

CLOSE on an ADDRESS BOOK: A man's hand flips to the H page and then his finger stops at the name Angela Hayes.

Lester, dressed for work, goes through Jane's address book. We HEAR the SHOWER running in the adjacent bathroom. He grabs Jane's phone and dials, then stands with the receiver to his ear, nervous.

ANGELA

(over phone line)

Hello? Hello?

Lester is frozen, unable to speak. Suddenly, the SHOWER is turned off in the next room. Lester hangs up and exits quickly. A moment, then the PHONE RINGS. Jane emerges from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her torso, drying her wet hair. She picks up the PHONE.

JANE

Hello?

INT. HAYES HOUSE - ANGELA'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

Angela is sprawled across her bed, on the phone.

ANGELA

Why'd you call me?

INTERCUT WITH JANE IN HER BEDROOM:

JANE

I didn't.

ANGELA

Well, my phone just rang and I answered it and somebody hung up and then I star sixty-nined and it called you back.

JANE

I was in the shower.

Then Jane notices her address book open to the H page.

JANE (cont'd)

Oh, gross.

EXT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

On VIDEO: We're across from Jane's WINDOW, looking in. Jane picks up the address book, frowning. She speaks into the phone, but we can't hear her.

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.C.)

(sing song)

Rick-y! Break-fast!

INT. FITTS HOUSE - RICKY'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

Ricky stands at his window, videotaping. He lowers his Digicam, but his eyes remain locked on Jane across the way.

RICKY

Be right there.

INT. FITTS HOUSE - KITCHEN - MOMENTS LATER

BARBARA FITTS stands at the stove, flipping bacon strips mechanically, her eyes focused elsewhere. At least ten years younger than her husband, she's pretty in a June Cleaver-ish way. The Colonel sits at a dinette reading The Wall Street Journal. Ricky enters.

RICKY

Mom.

Startled, Barbara turns to him.

BARBARA

Hello.

As she attempts to serve him bacon:

RICKY

I don't eat bacon, remember?

BARBARA

(unnerved)

I'm sorry, I must have forgotten.

Ricky serves himself scrambled eggs from another pan, then joins his father at the table.

RICKY

What's new in the world, Dad?

COLONEL

This country is going straight to hell.

A DOORBELL rings. The Colonel and Barbara look at each other, alarmed.

COLONEL (cont'd)

Are you expecting anyone?

BARBARA

No.

(thinks)

No.

The Colonel heads toward the living room, a little puffed up.

INT. FITTS HOUSE - FOYER - MOMENTS LATER

The Colonel opens the front door to reveal the two JIMS.

JIM #1

Hi.

JIM #2

Welcome to the neighborhood.

Jim #1 holds out a basket filled with flowers, vegetables and a small white cardboard box tied with raffia.

JIM #1

Just a little something from our garden.

JIM #2

Except for the pasta, we got that at Fallaci's.

JIM #1

It's unbelievably fresh. You just drop it in the water and it's done.

The Colonel stares at them, suspicious.

JIM #1 (cont'd)

(offers his hand)

Jim Olmeyer. Two doors down. Welcome to the neighborhood.

COLONEL

(shakes)

Colonel Frank Fitts, U.S. Marine Corps.

JIM #1

Nice to meet you. And this is my partner...

JIM #2

(offers his hand)

Jim Berkley, but people call me J.B.

COLONEL

Let's cut to the chase, okay? What are you guys selling?

JIM #2

(after a beat)

Nothing. We just wanted to say hi to our new neighbors--

COLONEL

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you said you're partners. So what's your business?

The Jims look at each other, then back at the Colonel.

JIM #1

Well, he's a tax attorney.

JIM #2

And he's an anesthesiologist.

The Colonel looks at them, confused. Then it dawns on him.

INT. COLONEL'S FORD EXPLORER - LATER

The Colonel drives, staring darkly at the road ahead. In the passenger seat, Ricky is using a CALCULATOR and jotting numbers down in a NOTEBOOK.

COLONEL

How come these faggots always have to rub it in your face? How can they be so shameless?

RICKY

That's the whole thing, Dad. They don't feel like it's anything to be ashamed of.

The Colonel looks at Ricky sharply.

COLONEL

Well, it is.

A beat, as Ricky continues his calculations, before he realizes a response is expected from him. Then:

RICKY

Yeah, you're right.

The Colonel's eyes flash angrily.

COLONEL

Don't placate me like I'm your mother, boy.

Ricky sighs, then looks at his father.

RICKY

Forgive me, sir, for speaking so bluntly, but those fags make me want to puke my fucking guts out.

The Colonel is taken aback but quickly covers.

COLONEL

Me too, son. Me too.

Case closed, Ricky goes back to his calculations.

CLOSE on the pencil in his hands: He's totaling two columns of NUMBERS. Under the column "Income" he writes in swift, bold strokes: $24,950.00.

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL CAMPUS - A SHORT TIME LATER

Jane and Angela are standing with two other TEENAGE GIRLS.

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